Growing up Des Moines – Ranting Rex

I grew up in Des Moines, Iowa. I lived in the same house until I was 20, got baptized, confirmed, and even married in the same Lutheran Church (although I went back for that last one 18 years later), and pretty much lived on the same side of town until I left the state at 29 years old. It was a great childhood, and I have to say I grew personally, professionally, and intellectually while living there. Hell, even the state slogan says that “It’s a Great Place to Grow.” Still, my education really wasn’t all that rounded until I left.

It’s a scary thing leaving the only place you know. People don’t think the same way about Iowa that Iowans think. For example, everyone outside the state pretty much thinks it’s flat, and covered in corn. I mean come on…why wouldn’t they? Every four years during caucus time they get a brief glimpse of farmers in their fields, and some politician being stupid enough to let their picture be taken deep throating a corndog. Seriously…can someone please tell them to stop doing that? It looks disgusting.

What people outside the state don’t get is that while there definitely is an agricultural side to the state, it also has its urban issues as well. I grew up in one of those urban areas. When I moved to Colorado Springs in the 90s they thought they were pretty metropolitan compared to Des Moines. Uh no. That’s like saying the Altoona, Iowa is pretty metropolitan compared to New York. The only thing metropolitan about Colorado Springs is Denver.

I was shocked when people in Colorado Springs would tell me to avoid the south side. I drove down there. It’s pretty much suburbia. I’m still not sure what they fear from that area. I think it’s because there are Hispanics down there. You see…Colorado Springs is so white that when it snows you can’t really tell. They’re also so Republican that Iowa Republicans come off as left wing communists. We’re all about the cross burnings down here.

You see, I grew up in a neighborhood that makes the south side of Colorado Springs seem pretty tame. Are there shootings in Colorado Springs? Yes. But as yet no one has shot an unsuspecting driver while they sat at a stoplight so the shooter could kill the people in the car on the other side of the innocent bystander. I’m still using that as my measuring stick. They did have a crazy guy hold up a Planned Parenthood, but which town doesn’t have their idiot? They just arm them here.

Anyway the reason I was writing this is because I was thinking about many of my friends in the Midwest and their political stances. Their ideas are deeply rooted in how and where they grew up. From their perspective the world works a certain way and there’s right and there’s wrong and you just don’t have to think about it. The problem is the world is a lot more complicated than the inner workings of the 10 or so square miles of east side Des Moines. This is why governing is so hard. You’re going to piss off half the population no matter what you do.

Still, that doesn’t mean you can’t educate yourself. Make yourself aware of what’s happening in other parts of the country, or other parts of the world. Most of the things I read from friends are based on a true desire to make the world a better place. The problem is that you have to go out and see the rest of the world before you can form an opinion. What’s good for you would is not always good for someone else. So for them I offer this: Leave! Visit other places. Don’t just go and vacation, get to know the locals. Try to understand them. Read! Read from and about people you don’t agree with. Don’t just get your news from TV. If you can travel that really is the best way. For some of you this will be easy. For others it will hard. For some of you it will be impossible. For the remaining few, I’m happy to pay for a ticket to Syria.

Kisses!

Rex

Oh…and P.S. You idiots that keep writing these memes about “You know you’re from Iowa if?” Cornhole was NOT a game created in Iowa. If you ask an Iowan what cornhole means (especially and East Sider) I don’t think you’ll be prepared for the answer.

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