My Misspent Youth…and Adulthood.

I have been whining so much, I decided to take a different tack this time. I made a list of some of the things I have done for entertainment. This is the primary reason it is not a good idea for me to be idle. You never knew what I will come up with.

1 Climbed onto the roof of my grade school by using the external conduit (two story building…I should be dead) to get on the roof and throw snowballs at cars. It was fun to see the drivers race around the neighborhood looking for someone they would never find.(age 9-13)
2.Broke into my grade school on a Sunday, and moved books around to different lockers (It was the 70s…they had no padlocks). (age 10)
3.Broke into my grade school on a Sunday, and moved the teachers’ desks, posters, equipment, etc., from room to room to confuse them. (age 11)
4.In the summer…got in a large group of kids, and when we saw a cop car everyone ran in all directions for no particular reason. It was fun to see the fat Iowa cop try to catch us (all of Jr. High). OK…after the third time this happened, I’m pretty sure the cops were in on it. (age 12-13)
5.Grabbed onto the bumpers of passing vehicles during snow storms for free rides around the neighborhood (age 10 to 15)
6.Got a group of students to pick up a jerk of a teacher’s VW and turn it sideways in a parking space so they can’t get out until someone leaves (age 13)
7.Learned the train schedule on the switch yard so I could catch a free ride north to Skate East to make out with girls. (age 14 -15)
8.Jacked up my neighbor’s car just high enough so I could block the wheels about 1 inch off the ground. They thought their transmission was shot. (age 17)
9.Dressed up like a police officer, and drove around the neighborhood in a 74 Toyota Corolla harassing the neighborhood kids. (age 15)
10. Switched keyboards around on co-workers computers so every time their cube mate typed, it came up on another screen. (age 25)
11.Rented a Crown Victoria on a business trip, and after leaving a banquet dinner with co-workers did U-turns on a two lane highway as cars passed to see how many brake lights came on. (age 26)
12.Set up a computer to play “Yellow Rose of Texas” every time the boss hit a key. (age 33)
13.During a bathroom remodel, borrowed a mannequin from a local store, and set it on the toilet I removed, and placed it in the front yard with the hand waving at passer’s by. (Age 38)
14.Removed the wheels from a co-workers desk chair after they glued my mouse to my desk. (age 40)
15.Bought the game CLUE for someone that just wasn’t getting the fact that the department Admin was propositioning them. (age 41)

I guess in the end, I was ornery as hell, and still am. I like it that way. It’s fun. Other than the damage to the nerves of a few drivers from snowballs, there was no major damage to property, no one got hurt, and I had a good time. Kids have no imagination today, with one exception. A few years ago I had to take my girlfriend down to pick up her son from the police station. Apparently, he and his friends had “borrowed” construction barricades, and blocked off certain streets, forcing cars to make detours. I got on my knees, in the station, and bowed to my young hero. I thought it was awesome! The ex…not so much. However, he gives me hope that the ornery will live onto the next generation.

Rex

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